Can a zebra change his spots? Yes he can!

Roger Kimball thinks Al Gore has become quite a comedian, and cites with devastating approval his recent column in the New York Times:

It is just lovely that the New York Times -- the world's most discredited newspaper -- would give so thoroughly discredited a mountebank this lavish soapbox upon which to make a fool of himself. Next stop, Hyde Park Corner -- or maybe a padded cell.
Likewise, Matt Drudge is having a ball with Al Gore -- playing lost and found in the snow!

gorefound.JPG

(The link goes to the same Times piece that Roger Kimball found so entertaining.)

As I like comedy, I thought I would come to the gratuitous defense of Al Gore the comedian. I think some of what he said would actually sound OK if applied in another context properly recontexted. Like this:

We would no longer have to worry that our grandchildren would one day look back on us as a criminal generation that had selfishly and blithely ignored clear warnings that their fate was in our hands.
That would be a perfectly appropriate thing to say about the need to so something about "entitlements" like Social Security or Medicare. The above words might draw cheers before a Tea Party crowd if uttered in that context.

At the risk of sounding a bit fantastic, I think Al Gore (who no longer has to run for office) might give some consideration to rebadging himself. What's to lose? The fact that he might look ridiculous? He's already looking completely ridiculous, and you can't get any more ridiculous than that. According to the saturation principle (especially as applied in SCUBA diving), once you are saturated with something, more becomes inconsequential, and there's no particular risk.

Despite Frank Rich's insistence that the Tea Partiers are far-right terrorists, Nancy Pelosi has already greased the skids for Al Gore by saying,

"We share some of the views of the Tea Partiers."
Considering his present state of saturated buffoonery, Al Gore could easily take that a step further, and claim that he invented "took the initiative in creating" the Tea Parties. And why not? After all, did he not also take the initiative in creating something almost as maligned as Tea Parties?
Throughout most of my life, I raised tobacco. I want you to know that with my own hands, all of my life, I put it in the plant beds and transferred it. I've hoed it. I've dug in it. I've sprayed it, I've chopped it, I've shredded it, spiked it, put it in the barn and stripped it and sold it.
What's not to like about that? Now I realize that Gore later declared that cigarette smoking causes global warming, but that was only to demonstrate the hilarious truth of another of his obviously comedic hypotheses:
A zebra does not change its spots.
Don't laugh. There really is such an animal, and there's even a book about it:

spottedzebra.jpg

I haven't read the book, so I don't know whether there's a happy ending, much less a moral lesson.

But it's a tragedy to think that global warming might lead to the extinction of the spotted zebra.

MORE: On Facebook, John Hawkins quotes Al Gore with approval:

"I, for one, genuinely wish that the climate crisis were an illusion."
Replies John, "Your wish has been granted, Al."

Considering that the "climate crisis" is an illusion Al Gore "took the initiative in creating," maybe it's time to just fess up. (He could always claim that he was the first man to receive the Nobel Prize in Magic.)

MORE: Lest we forget, Al Gore is also a bible-waving fanatic!

gorebook.jpg

posted by Eric on 03.01.10 at 12:31 PM





TrackBack

TrackBack URL for this entry:
http://classicalvalues.com/cgi-bin/pings.cgi/9424






Comments

About a year ago I predicted that by 2011 Al Gore would be screaching about the coming ice age that's GONNA KILL US ALL! that we're causing with all our industry and stuff.

It's looking good.
The reason I picked that is because the Sun has been quiet lately (too quiet), no sunspots means less solar wind means more cosmic rays means more clouds means colder Earth (supposedly).
So the Sun, after nearly two years of quiet, appears to be starting back up.
http://sohowww.nascom.nasa.gov/data/synoptic/sunspots_earth/?C=M;O=D
(click around over the last two years, notice how many days there are no sunspots. Since early January? They're coming relatively quickly and there always seems to be at least one and often more)
So, increased sunspots means greater solar wind means less cosmic rays means less cloud cover means hotter Earth.

Since Al Gore is an idiot, just as he's noticing that it's cooling it will start to warm so he'll be screaching about the coming ice age sometime next year.
And wherever he goes it will be much warmer than normal.
Because Gaia hates Al Gore.

Veeshir   ·  March 1, 2010 12:53 PM

Well, Gaia may hate Al Gore, but Chione (the goddess of snow and ice) seems to love him.

http://www.godchecker.com/pantheon/greek-mythology.php?deity=CHIONE

Because wherever the Goreacle goes, Chione follows.

Eric Scheie   ·  March 3, 2010 11:22 AM

Sure for now, but once he's on the coming ice age crusade it'll be Mr Heat Miser messing with him.

Veeshir   ·  March 3, 2010 01:04 PM

Post a comment

You may use basic HTML for formatting.





Remember Me?

(you may use HTML tags for style)


March 2010
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
  1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30 31      

ANCIENT (AND MODERN)
WORLD-WIDE CALENDAR


Search the Site


E-mail



Classics To Go

Classical Values PDA Link



Archives



Recent Entries



Links



Site Credits