Did you know that if you like small breasts on women, you're likely a "pedophile"?

I didn't, but today I learned that some people think that, and they're just the kind of people who enjoy career censorship. In Australia, they're behind an effort to insist on large-breasted women in porn. No really. (I couldn't make this up if I tried.)

A reader writes, "Australian Classification Board (ACB) is now banning depictions of small-breasted women in adult publications and films. They banned mainstream pornography from showing women with A-cup breasts, apparently on the grounds that they encourage paedophilia, and in spite of the fact this is a normal breast size for many adult women. Presumably small breasted women taking photographs of themselves will now be guilty of creating simulated child pornography, to say nothing of the message this sends to women with modestly sized chests or those who favour them. Australia has also banned pornographic depictions of female ejaculation, a normal orgasmic sexual response in many women, with censors branding it as 'abhorrent.'"

The Board has also started to ban depictions of small-breasted women in adult publications and films. This is in response to a campaign led by Kids Free 2 B Kids and promoted by Barnaby Joyce and Guy Barnett in Senate Estimates late last year. Mainstream companies such as Larry Flint's Hustler produce some of the publications that have been banned. These companies are regulated by the FBI to ensure that only adult performers are featured in their publications. "We are starting to see depictions of women in their late 20s being banned because they have an A cup size", she said. "It may be an unintended consequence of the Senator's actions but they are largely responsible for the sharp increase in breast size in Australian adult magazines of late".

The war on sex can take many twisted turns. Fortunately, I have yet to see an equivalent effort like this in the United States. But ideas spread, don't they?

I'm surprised that no one has picked up on the possible latent homophobia displayed by the censors. It is well known that small-breasted women (and the men who find them attractive) have long been ridiculed as "gay," with the women being called "boys" or "boyish" in a direct attempt to impute homosexual pedophilia. A classic example of this was the reaction of Frank Sinatra's ex to his marriage to Mia Farrow:

Ava Gardner on Frank Sinatra's marriage with Mia Farrow: 'I always knew Frank would end up with a boy.'

In practice, what this amounts to is a ban on androgynous porn. I suppose that if they were "fair," they would also ban male porn models who lacked sufficient muscle definition, or who were deemed insufficiently hirsute.

People are of course free to criticize or condemn the sexual tastes of others, but Australia is a good lesson in what happens when the government gets into the business of setting sexual tastes.

And if you don't think there are organized activists in this country who are just chomping at the bit to get into regulating porn, why, there are plenty of sites like this where you can go have yourself a scroll. I keep telling myself that people like that are few in number and only represent the lunatic fringes of cultural conservatism.

But I've also seen similar activism on the left, so I worry.

MORE: A commenter to the above worries about the size issue in the context of men:

Next they will ban porn with men with smaller penises because it may promote pedophilia.