Via Pajamas Media, I just learned about a wonderful new product called "Thriving Office" which offers something for everybody:

Thriving Office is a recording of office noises.

The sales pitch says it all:

Small businesses know they must seem successful to become successful. So they play Thriving Office while they're on the phone. This valuable CD is filled with the sounds people expect to hear from an established company, providing instant credibility

CEO Bill Freund tells me that the reach is broader again. Some buyers have purchased the CD to play when they are off the phone as a means to increase their productivity. A number of larger companies have also begun using the CD to supplement office sounds; the noise from Thriving Office being more effective than natural noise in the workplace in painting a picture of office life to customers.

"Yes dear, I'll be working quite late tonight. That awful Mr. Finster is making everyone stay here until the report is in final form, and I'm sure we'll all be working overtime till midnight!"

Or,

"First of all, let me stress that there is no reason to panic in a situation like yours. We just need to ask a few standard questions. So please, don't worry!"

Put the CD (or the sound file) in your laptop and play it from anywhere -- even inside a payphone or bathroom, or in the corner of a crowded bar. For the more tech-minded, I'm sure it wouldn't very hard to get it stream into your telephone as background noise.

Or you could just drive people crazy by playing the CD and not saying anything about where you are. If people ask, you could tell the truth but in a nervous and rapid manner "No, I'm at home!" or "Office? No I'm in my hotel room!"

Tell the truth, but in such a way that they'll be convinced you have much to hide.

I'm sure con artists and psychopaths can think of other uses, but this is a very handy device for playing on people's assumptions.