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November 13, 2008
Governmentium
Here is a funny bit I found in the comments at No Quarter. == The Heaviest Element Known to Science Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neut rons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of morons promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons. Cross Posted at Power and Control posted by Simon on 11.13.08 at 12:26 AM
Comments
After further investigation, some scientists say they expect to find that the atomic weight is actually 535. Donna B. · November 13, 2008 02:13 PM But is there any practical use for this discovery? Is it going to be the new teflon? OregonGuy · November 13, 2008 05:04 PM Post a comment
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