SPAMMERS, the lions are hungry!

Hey, when I was still fairly new to blogging, I thought I was a bit over the top (if in line with the ancients) when I called for crucifixion of spammers.

Well, this guy's spam-fighting program makes me look like a total wuss:

Booher threatened to send a "package full of Anthrax spores" to the company, to "disable" an employee with a bullet and torture him with a power drill and ice pick; and to hunt down and castrate the employees unless they removed him from their e-mail list, prosecutors said.

In a telephone interview with Reuters, Booher acknowledged that he had behaved badly but said his computer had been rendered almost unusable for about two months by a barrage of pop-up advertising and e-mail.

(via Eugene Volokh.)

It's a very competitive world out there.

What must I do to keep up with the Joneses?

Maybe I should up the ante, Marcus Aurelius style:

[T]he flesh of the martyrs of Christ, by many scourgings and stripes, was lacerated and torn loose even to the inmost veins and deepest sinews, so that their entrails and the most secret parts could be seen moving; and that the torturers then strewed potsherds, sea-shells, and even caltrops on the ground, over which they rolled, dragged; and on which they pressed the Christians thus. tormented, with their naked bodies; and that at last, when they, on account of the previous torments, could scarcely live or draw breath any longer, they cast them before the wild beasts, to be devoured by them...
Obviously, the word "Spammer" should be substituted for "Christian."

Will Spammers become martyrs evocative of sympathy? I know the idea sounds silly, but believe it or not, someone has already written Haiku poetry about it:

Sad sow seeks meaning
Religion found, she gives all
Now proud SPAM martyr
--Gladta B. Spam
OK, I'll go with that.

Make 'em proud!

posted by Eric on 11.25.03 at 11:38 AM


Listed below are links to weblogs that reference SPAMMERS, the lions are hungry!:

» AT LONG LAST! from The SmarterCop
Lo and behold... links aplenty! L is for loris, though it looks a lot like a lemur. L is for lasting lyrics. L is for lions, to which Spammers should be fed. L is for the League of Liberals, losing,... [Read More]
Tracked on November 25, 2003 2:07 PM


The next 2000 years: everybody being bombarded with spam in the form of Chick tracts demanding that everyone worship a dead spammer as their PERSONAL Savior or else burn in Hell forever?

Steven Malcolm Anderson   ·  November 25, 2003 11:35 PM

It is dangerous to confuse children with angels.

Carr Eve   ·  February 28, 2004 5:14 AM

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