(And this is as ridiculous a post as the title suggests....)

Welcome to Friday Online Testing at Classical Values. This weekly tradition invariably forces me to confront things about myself I'd never confront, and bare them to the world.

The first test -- "What Kind of Shoe Are You?" -- I thought would reveal more than it did, but I guess I should be glad that I am living up to the Classical Values tradition of baring my "sole" each week.....

Barefoot- free, rebellious, and wild, you hate
boundries and rules. You tend to be on the
crazy side and often sweep people up along with
you. You are most likely the leader of your
group of friends. [please vote! thank you! :)]


What Kind of Shoe Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I don't recall where I found this test, and if any of my readers supplied the link to it, let me know and I'll be glad to credit you.

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I am glad to see that my esteemed friend and colleague Ghost of a flea has been finding more of these online tests, because it makes things much easier. Plus I get to compare my results to his. (While we've often been identical, today it's only one out of three).

Not to duck the more pressing issues, but I thought I'd start with the silliest of the Flea's three -- the "Captain Quack Rubber Duck Quiz"!

The Flea is a "trendsetter" duck who got the test from Inventive David at Sketches of Strain. I don't know how the test defines "well rounded", but I guess I shouldn't complain.

But doesn't the picture look like one of those rubber duckies used in bathtubs?

RUBBER DUCKIE UPDATE: I never imagined any tie-in between these online tests and major currrent events, but in an update to my Kerry daisy post (in response to speculation here), I suggested that the senator consider using this Devil Duckie as a zipper pull. (Just thought I should make the "Captain Quack" test writers aware of it!)

Oh what the hell! The image is too irresistible not to post. Here it is:

The Devil Duckie made me do it!

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Next from the Flea comes "Which Famous Homosexual are you?" -- although I'm not sure I could ever live up to the title. (For starters, I'm more on the infamous side....)

My results weren't bad, really:

Which Famous Homosexual are you?
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey

Mychal Judge's background: "chaplain to the New York Fire Department, was tragically killed when one of the World Trade Centre towers collapsed on September 11, 2001. You provided years of Christian service, and will be remembered forever for your heroism."

Of course, the Flea is Eleanor Roosevelt, and while I am not particularly crushed that I didn't get to be a left-wing ambassador to the UN, I am positively steamed to learn that Michael Demmons gets to be Alexander the Great!

Now that's totally unfair!

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There's even more from the prodigious Flea!

More tea!

Cor blimey, I taste like Tea. I am a subtle flavour, quiet and polite, gentle, almost ambient. My presence in crowds will often go unnoticed. Best not to spill me on your clothes though, I can leave a nasty stain. What Flavour Are You?

My deepest thanks to the Flea -- who rhymes with tea and got the same result as me! That's two for tea....

and....

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One for Infinity!

I am infinity You may worship me, but from afar _

(Via Postcards from Nowhere, who's at least as infinite as I am.)

That's the end.

But I'll be back, because Infinity has no end.