Larry Magid's piece on EULAs was a real eye opener:

I have a deal for you. In exchange for a free piece of software that helps you keep track of your passwords and other log on information, I'm going to install other programs on your PC that will track your web surfing and display advertising that pops-up on your screen. There will also be other types of ads on your computer based on information we collect.

Does that sound like a good deal to you? Well, if you're one of the many Windows users who have installed eWallet software from Gain Publishing that's exactly what you agreed to do. But you already know that because you read the End User License Agreement or "EULA" that was available prior to installing the program. You did read it right? Of course you did; before you could install the software you had to check a box certifying that you read the agreement. Legally speaking, that's the same thing as signing a contract with pen and ink.

To its credit, not everything in Gain's EULA is in legalese. You don't have to pay a Harvard law graduate $300 an hour to understand the first paragraph:

"GAIN Publishing offers some of the most popular software available on the Internet free of charge ("GAIN-Supported Software") in exchange for your agreement to also install GAIN AdServer software ("GAIN"), which will display Pop-Up, Pop-Under, and other types of ads on your computer based on the information we collect as stated in this Privacy Statement. We refer to consumers who have GAIN on their system as 'Subscribers.' "

The rest of GAIN's EULA is also pretty clear. If you take the time to read it, you'll realize that you're giving the company permission to install software that "collects certain non-personally identifiable information about your Web surfing and computer usage." This, according to the agreement, "includes the URL addresses of the Web pages you view and how long you view Web pages; non-personally identifiable information on Web pages and forms including the searches you conduct on the Internet; your response to online ads; Zip code/postal code; country and city; standard web log information and system settings; what software is on the computer."

How can the utterly personal be made so impersonal?

(No wonder so many people are running around just waiting for a chance to get even! With anyone, anywhere.)

Lest you think that the purloined information is going to remain with the company whose software you installed, think again:

The company says that it has all sorts of procedures in place to "restrict the third party's use of the information we provide." That's all well and good, but even if the company is as sincere and diligent as it says it is, things can change. And, if the company does decide to change its policy on how it handles personally identifiable information, it "will notify you by posting proposed changes to this Privacy Statement and on our web site." Those changes "will be effective immediately upon such posting.

And don't think that can't happen. Even if the current owners are committed to keeping information private, there is no guarantee that the company won't be sold. If it goes bankrupt, there is even the possibility of your information being sold to pay off creditors.

I guess now it's read what you click. The way things are right now, they could probably put a clause in there allowing the company to hire a hit man to kill you, and most people would impatiently click "ACCEPT."