No blogging all day, and almost no blogging tonight!

I said "almost" because I just fixed what I have called my "IMPOSSIBLE problems with Verizon's sucky-ass, on-again/off-again DSL".

It always tends to occur in the rain, and this week, in addition to DSL failure, on Monday the phone became unusable because of a loud hum which drowned out the dial tone itself.

Verizon "repair" (that is what they call themselves) came today while I was out, and wedged a note in my door stating that the problem had been theirs but had been fixed.

Fine.

I went inside, picked up the phone, and NO DIAL TONE AT ALL.

I have been through this "interface" device crap before, so I went outside with a 3/8 nutdriver, removed the cover screw, and -- lo and behold -- they had not plugged the phone line back in! So I plugged it in, and was greeted by a scratchy dial tone, but hey! at least it worked. I fired up the computer and had Internet, but that lasted only for about twenty minutes.

For the past two hours I struggled with Verizon repair, and DSL technical support. I will say this: DSL is at least populated by human beings. "Repair" is a crazed, illogical voice mail system, which makes me feel sorry for Verizon's customers.

Repair solved nothing except a promise to come back on Friday, but at least DSL tech support stepped me through the usual modem troubleshooting, and when they ran their signal test, they said my line was "erratic" and drawing far too much current -- a signal consistent with a malfunctioning cordless phone. (I don't use cordless phones.) Unplugging everything except the phone I was using, they still got the same result.

For my efforts, I gleaned a "trouble ticket!"

Still not satisfied, I decided to take a closer look at the work performed by "repair."

Another trip outside (in wet, sleety, snowy weather) and this time I inspected very carefully. I was completely shocked to see that the inside of this "weatherproof" plastic box was soaked with water! It was all over the wires inside, and worst of all, water was leaking from inside the modem plugs!

This called for war.

I armed myself with a box of Q-tips, some paper towels, and an electric hair dryer plugged into a 50' extension cord, and went to work.

But then I thought of you, my readers, who may be wondering why I disappeared. Just so you can see what I am talking about, here's a photo of the terminals, which really doesn't show the water, but will give a general idea of the problem. (Actually, you might be able to spot some of the water; it was enough to soak the Q-tips.)

(Nice having a macro setting....)

After further drying, I decided to check again, but then I thought, hmmmm.... Surely they wouldn't have left the brass screw-down terminals loose? Fortunately, they're also 3/8 inch, so I started checking for tightness, and whoa! Not even hand tight! It was as if the guy (or girl, or whatever) had simply put the wires in position (they had been moved to another set of terminals in the box) and forgotten to tighten them -- along with forgetting to plug in the line.

All of the wires were loose.

Unbelievable.

Of course, no one can be fired, no one is in charge, and no one cares.

There is no "there" there.